James, you came into my life when I needed you the most.
Man... I hated Springer. I had a good thing going at my old school, I was loved by the masses, it felt like I had a million friends. Leaving all of that behind, was not cool. And I was leaving it behind to go to a school where I didn't know a single person. I started attending Springer in 3rd grade right after Christmas break. My days were bookended with a 2 hour bus ride to and from school. Sandwiched between were cold class rooms, where I was forced to confront the fact that I couldn't read.
Dude, it was the worst.
I remember the first time I saw you. There was a very loud voice surrounded by people that were laughing. Every time I saw you, it was just like that. It made me pretty jealous. I was in a strange place and someone was doing my job. Being an object of affection and making people laugh was my wheel house. That year, we were on different sides of the building. I never ended up meeting you, I just knew of your loud voice that people seemed to love.
Next year was 4th grade and just my luck, that loud funny guy was in my class. During free time, I noticed you were drawing pictures of guns (really good pictures) you included details like the latch that disconnects the magazine. I didn't know what a magazine was back then, but I knew your pictures looked like my GI Joe's guns and I was impressed. But I wasn't going to let you know that.
Enough was enough, it was time to confront this monster. I didn't introduce myself, I just sad "guns are bad." I cant remember exactly you said to me, but it must have been incredible. I went into that conversation hating you and I left with a friend.
It felt like my learning disabilities had robbed me of a happy childhood. But you stole it back. I will always be grateful for that.
I still can't believe that loud voice ended up being my best friend, a life friend, and one of the finest people I'll ever know.
James, you were one of only people at my bachelor party that wasn't on my college lacrosse team. Leading up to the party, my other fiends were asking about you and wondering who you were. I had a really hard time describing you. Well guys, have you ever met a medieval knight, possessing an inhuman amount of compassion who can make you laugh and can do a tracheotomy?
James, you were too good for this world. I mean that. How much you cared is simply unreal. It breaks my heart my kids will never get to meet you. I wish they could have seen your spark. The light and organic joy that you brought to every moment. That's what I'm going to miss the most.
These past few days I've been catching up with family and old friends telling them about my visit with you. Everyone keeps saying what a good friend I am for spending that time with you. I don't see it that way. I was lucky. Lucky that you and your family let me share that precious time with you. I wouldn't have traded a second of it.
James, I'm going to carry your light wherever I go. I will always miss you. I love you buddy.
-D. Christian Schaefer
Christian, what amazing words. Years and years ago, I first knew you as my annoying brother‘s little shithead friend, but you stuck around and continued to be such an important part of James’s life. I knew when we spoke on the phone weeks ago that you never stopped caring. Thank you, so so much for loving my brother so fiercely. He knew. He always knew. And that helped him at the end.
That's beautiful. Isn't it funny how those moments in 3rd grade could shape the course of your life? Life is really amazing. I love this peek into the life of two sweet boys. 💙